Meet Reginald T. Harrington III, former hedge-fund partner turned lavatory philosopher. After a particularly revelatory IPO roadshow in a Singapore hotel suite, Reginald realized the world was ready for toilet humour with venture-grade taste.
Reginald still wears the same black cashmere turtleneck from the ’97 launch party. It has never been washed. It has never needed washing.
Our flagship joke. A rural two-holer goes public. The prospectus reads: “Strong fundamentals. Excellent liquidity. Zero dilution from new investors—only dilution of the existing product.”
Our strategic partnership with CompuServe lets users log their daily output via 28.8k modem. Early adopters receive a limited-edition mouse pad featuring a tasteful line drawing of a commode.
Named after Reginald himself. A slow, deliberate, single-pull flush that says “I own equity in this moment.”
Flush.com is currently raising its second round. Preferred seating on the porcelain throne comes with quarterly dividend jokes and a signed 8×10 of Reginald in his signature turtleneck.